The need for change

Leadership Personal Growth

The need for change

Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, Tinder, WeChat, are words that could literally cause you to break out into a cold sweat. Everything today is done on an app or found online. We are living in such a fast paced world and we really need to find a way to keep up, hence these blogs.

So, what’s a blog……..who blogs and why? Well according to the dictionary, it’s a regularly updated website or web page, one run by an individual or small group, that is written in an informal or conversational style.

Who blogs, we do, why, because we took up a scary challenge. We are at the start of a new era and we felt a deep need to change, to grow to learn and to make a difference. Who’s we, well that would be me and my best friend, my hubby Martin. 

We have lead a very privileged adult life, a life surrounded by great people, a life surrounded by people who have challenged our thinking. We have read many books and listened to hundreds of CD’s, watched numerous podcasts all with the intention of living a better life and becoming a better person. Neither of us came from great circumstances as youngsters but we both always felt a need to learn from our experiences and to change and to grow as individuals. 

I was once advised by a very wise gentleman that we have two choices in life. The first choice would be to live in our past, blaming everything that is wrong with our lives on past experiences. The reason we have no money is because we were raised poor. The reason we have not found true love is because our parents were divorced. The reason we don’t have a great career is because we never had the money for university.

The second choice we have is to live above our past and in this case we use all the negatives of our past to springboard us onto a better future. We are going to have a great marriage unlike our parents. We are going to be successful, irrespective of our level of education. We are not going to fall into the poverty trap just because we were raised poor because the real truth is, if you were born poor, that’s not your fault, but if you die poor that’s a completely different story.

We have subsequently done many courses and have been accredited to teach others how to achieve excellence, we have also been certified as NLP coaches enabling us to coach individuals with regards their personal problems

As a result, people have described us as wise. I often thought they really had no idea of who I was, as I barely scraped through school. I subsequently discovered the meaning of “wise” and that is, one who has the ability to make good judgements, based on a deep understanding and experience of life. This sentence alone qualified me as wise, because  deep experience I do have.

I was recently inspired by the story of an author, who had lost everything he owned in a fire, This included all his material wealth, his worldly possessions, his clothing, his photographs, his books, which was indeed very sad. However he had one blessing, he had not lost that which was within him. He had not lost his life lessons, his growth as an individual, the knowledge he had attained over years, his humility, integrity and the list goes on. This was, all because he was always willing to grow, change and learn.

So to reexamine the need for change we can put our thoughts into four headings:

What needs to change

So what needs to change. This question is as long as a piece of string. Some of us have committed to regular change and some of us have no idea we need to change and others have never felt a need to change.

You may have to look at your career path, you may feel you are not realising your full potential. You may have to look more deeply at your health and exercise might have to be added. You may have to get rid of your negative mindset. You may have to make a decision to slow down and take the time to love your life. 

For each person, change is different and certainly happens at different stages in our lives but one thing for sure is change is inevitable and if we don’t control it, it will control us.

Who needs to change

One sentence had a huge impact on my life many years ago and it was simply, “If you are not growing and changing you are dying”. This has subsequently been researched and diseases like Dementia/Alzheimer’s have been related back  to personal stimulation and lack of exercise. This requires us to change our daily routine.

So we all need to change, to grow, to feel fulfilled. The world change in itself could sound very negative. You may feel you don’t need to change but if we ever want a different life, change will be required. Not all change is comfortable, some change is scary but one thing for sure is positive change will provide you with a better lifestyle.

Why we need to change

The world around us is changing. Careers are changing, education is changing and even the weather is changing. We are seeing driverless cars, drones, robotics making history everyday. It would be irresponsible for us not to know what is going on around us. There are so many opportunities available to us if we embrace change, the way we travel, the way we get information, the way we make choices, like which restaurants to visit, which books to read, what paths to take.

When we should effect change

Today……make a decision today to just change one thing and work from there. If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you. 

So in conclusion, identify one thing, yes just one thing that needs to change for you personally. Can you establish the effects that one change will have in your life ten years from now. A book that describes this so well is The Compound Effect and one example that comes to mind relates to eating  hamburgers. If you ate a burger a day, would that have a negative effect on your life? The answer is clearly no, but if you ate a hamburger everyday for the next ten years, that will have a dramatic effect on your body and it won’t be positive.

So what are you currently doing that is not serving you well? Do you procrastinate, are you always late, do you eat incorrectly, are you doing any form of exercise, do you need to change your career path?

Examine your weaknesses and set a goal to make a change. From a personal point of view, I always perform best when I share my goals with others. This helps me to step up to the plate. Another great idea is to find someone who will hold you accountable.,This could be your spouse, a close friend, a work colleague or even a life coach. The only prerequisite is that this person should be someone who will encourage you and help to keep you on track during the tough times. Choose this person wisely. Ask yourself if they have qualities you admire and respect and make sure they will have a positive impact in your life.

If you make a decisive decision then you will look back a year from now and say I’m glad I did as opposed to saying I wish I had.

One Comment

  1. Its so hard when reading this how simple it all sounds to change.. Yet for many of us myself included that task is dauntingly and uncomprehensively difficult to apply in ones life. With the manic pace speed and pressures in our day to day living, as we just exist in our rat race of society, for me trying to i effrrt or implement change in ones life is like trying to change the wheel on a car that is strill driving at 100km / hour. How do you stop the world for a moment to let yourself breath regroup and regather and realign your bearings and your compass as to where you want to go, who do you want to be and how are you going to get there?
    A mantra of mine has always been..”The only way to predict your future is to change it. Which i believe echoes your amazing article. You have the power to control your life and not let it control you. Sadly however so many of us are totally disempowered and dont really LIVE our lives! we just exist in a world of routines, habits and comfort zones of compliance, and acceptance, grasping at sweet moments of joy in the frenetic noise of just exisiting. Si iften the root of this madness is driven by money! Todays evil where miney has becine synonomous with safety security health and a happy future. So sad. So how to find the time to just stop the world and get off for just a moment to breathe..and have a loik at ones life for what it really is, is the real question. Only then can you realky know what you want to, need to and should change to really start living.

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